would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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