I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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