I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Randomize
