The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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