But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Randomize
