I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
