hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
two words: eviction party
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
