Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
