You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
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