why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
