question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
dude. I can hear the air.
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize