used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Randomize
