my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize