he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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