woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
