Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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