Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
