Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
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