Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
