put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize
