it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize
