Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
we're so committed to being not committed
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Randomize
