They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
ugly people sure do ruin things
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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