Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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