He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
