evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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