Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
