You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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