its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Randomize
