It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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