just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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