the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Randomize
