am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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