This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
