I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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