we have officially lost it.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
