Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
