We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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