I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
