Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
