He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
