so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
