Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
