Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
