gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
