I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
