Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
