I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
