he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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