Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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