garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
